I don't really have to be 30 if I don't feel 30, right? Okay, so maybe I do feel 30 (especially after having Heidi--what is up with that?), but do I have be 30 if I don't look 30? I mean, some people think I don't look old enough to have a driver's license. Either way, the day has come and it has been a lovely day, but for some reason it is hitting harder than I thought. I am fully aware that 30 is still "young", but I guess I just thought I would be in my 20s forever. I know it's just a number, but it just seems like time is going by way, way, way too fast. I'm afraid if I blink I'll be turning 40 and Heidi will be almost 11, and that just can't happen because I have told her repeatedly that she is not allowed to grow up. I figure if I tell her enough, she will listen. Actually, I think it's her first birthday next week that is freaking me out even more.
I have learned a lot in the last decade and have absolutely nothing to regret or be sad about. I have an incredible husband who treats me far better than I deserve and I have a funny, funny little girl who has completely stolen my heart. I can't put my finger on why 30 seems old. Maybe it just bothers me that I am 30 and only have one little baby?? I thought for sure I would have two by now and I want to be able to have time to have a family without feeling rushed. I don't think of other people in their thirties as old, it just seems old on me. Oh well, what can do? Life is going much too fast, but I sure have a lot to be grateful for. For your enjoyment, here is a picture of me some 26 years ago.
2 comments:
Happy birthday to you and little miss Heidi!
I say you are only as old as you feel or act. My kids say I act about 15 - 18. You don't look your age so you are good to go, just have fun and be intouch with your interchild and you never really age :)
I hope you had an incredible birthday!!!
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